When the heat subsides: an Autumnal Reflection
In Midsummer
In midsummer, in those pockets of time when the oppressive heat subsides, I return outdoors with a renewed love of the present moment. A welcome reminder that the easeful moments of stepping outside are fleeting. Because even though I can walk out of my house quite easily without much preparation to weather the elements at the height of intense summer heat, being outside isn’t necessarily pleasant.
In Late Summer
I find a feeling of relief. However, as I reflect, I also notice a sense of sadness. Or perhaps disappointment. It’s a reminder that summer is ending. Why would the anticipation of Summer making way for Autumn cause such negative feelings? I do quite love the coming season, after all. Why not a cooling reminder of the joy the season regularly brings into my life?
Well, that is because I am acutely aware that on the other side of autumn is winter (cue dramatic music: “dun dun dun”). You see, I get cold quite quickly, do not engage in winter sports such as skiing or snowboarding, and frankly, for much of my life, I would spend the winter months wishing them away—despite my being a winter baby!
A couple of years ago, it finally dawned on me: the unfortunate reality that I dreaded a quarter of the year and, therefore, wished to rush past a quarter of my finite life. Since then, I’ve worked hard to improve my relationship with winter.
Thinking back, the catalyst for this change was the pandemic. It was late autumn in 2020, and I knew that this disease wasn’t going away any time soon. We’d still be keeping to ourselves and unable to go places that would entertain the kids and keep them occupied. Nor me; I’d have nowhere to lift my spirits in the cold winter months.
I knew the only way I’d survive winter with some micron of sanity was to get outside with my then 5-year-old son and 2-year-old twin girls. So, my preparations began. I had played with the idea of buying one of those outdoor propane heaters, but thankfully, the cost and availability were prohibitive—and that wasn’t what I really needed. Finding alternative solutions, I made sure the kids and I had quality boots and outerwear, the kind that Minnesotans might wear. And it just so happened that my brother-in-law lived there, so I reached out for recommendations. So I found myself a pair of very warm, waterproof sneaker-like winter boots from Soral and a silly-looking yet remarkably warm multi-layered hat with ear flaps. Thankfully, I also learned about waterproof, fleece-lined pants, which you couldn’t exactly call “snow pants”—I didn’t want to have to put on a full-blown snow suit any time I went out with the kids—so those went into my cart as well. I still had my old ski jacket from my brief snowboarding stint back in college, and I was thankful I wouldn’t have to add that to my list of purchases as the bill had been starting to pile pretty high.
Well, it was worth it. I had been prepared for the winter. I was ready to get outside, and my perspective on the bearability of winter began to shift slightly. We did have a few snow storms that winter, and we got out with the kids, made snowmen, and created snow slides from the piles that had built up at the corners of the driveway. Even when there wasn’t enough snow to play in, we got outdoors and soaked in as much sun as we could muster. This was the beginning for me— the realization that there’s no bad weather, only bad clothing, as the Norse proverb reminds us. I was starting to make sure that I had the right tools at hand to make it easier to enjoy the winter months.
For the Love of Autumn
Returning to the topic of subsiding heat, I love that cooler weather after the oppressive heat steps back a little, as it has in the last few weeks. I love the 50-70+ degree temperature range; at the higher end of the spectrum, you can walk outside, and it feels almost the same as if you’re in your air-conditioned home—perfect comfort. And at the lower end, you can step out in your house shoes (if you’re like me, you have house shoes), maybe throw on a sweater, and head out. The crispness awakens me, makes me feel alive. And a momentary shudder wakes up the body and the mind.
And so, before changing my feelings about winter, I found every Autumn bittersweet. This season I actually loved was tarnished by the dread of winter coming up on its heels. I loved the cool air, the cozy, comforting scents, the changing, rustling leaves, but not entirely. Part of my mind was always dreading the near future, which meant I did not allow myself to be fully present and appreciative of this incredible time of year. It’s an unfortunate truth, but I am proud to say that I now call Autumn my favorite season—but only by a bit. I absolutely love autumn and welcome it as it returns to my life each year.
Today, as the heat subsides as summer winds down, I find relief in the cooler temperatures—complete relief. What a joyful state of being! It is a beautiful gift I’ve given myself—thank you, self—to be completely content in the present moment.
What can I say? As I’ve just professed my undying love for the season, allow me to list how it brings me joy:
Spice and cider-scented candles; lots of candles throughout the house; darker mornings so when I wake up early and come to my desk to write or meditate, I light a few warming candles instead of flicking on the lights; heading out to the country to gather firewood, laying out the firewood in their holding spots, prepared to be used in our firepit and wood stove; making a pilgrimage out to a local hard cidery with friends; going apple-picking with family; cider donuts; raking up the leaves into piles for the kids to jump into; and something new for this coming autumn, we’ll be collecting the leaves to use as mulch in our flower beds—any extra will go into the compost pile in early preparation for the growing season that will come on the other side of winter. I’m sure my garden is looking forward to it.
Embracing Winter: Adding Hygge
In winter, I look out into the cold air. It’s deceiving sometimes. The clear blue sky and bright sun shining, it almost looks warm out there. But I know. I know that it is cold, layers necessary to endure the reality. The trees are the ones who are most honest with me. Their bare branches show the true nature of the season. It’s cold out there. But you know what, if the trees and wildlife can be out there all winter, I, too, can step out into this natural life experience of the changing seasons.
I can’t yet say that I love winter; I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to say that. However, I can say that I appreciate winter and the slowing down it brings. The crucial change for me in getting to this point was the determination to find a way to stop the cycle in which I wish to rush past a quarter of my days. I knew this change was one key to my overall happiness.
It is the Danish concept of hygge (pronounced ‘HOO-guh’) that ultimately helped me through this transition. Hygge can be loosely translated into coziness, but it’s so much more than that, which I’ve written about in more detail in [link to blog post].
While hygge is not limited to the winter months, it is especially crucial in winter when the lack of daylight and easy access to the outdoors is limited. Here is a list of 5 concepts that I pulled into my own hygge winter life are:
Embracing the darkness: I’m referring to embracing the boundless potential for coziness that dark days bring. This is a time when I’m putting my candles to good use. Instead of using electric lighting, I light as many candles as I reasonably can. The tactile warmth and physical nature of candles create a warmth inside me.
Blankets: I flood the home with big, soft blankets I can wrap myself in while I tuck into a good book or work on one of my cozy wintertime hobbies (more on that later). Whether it’s just me using a blanket or my family sitting together on the couch wrapped up together watching a movie, blankets can create a warm embrace, making everyone feel better.
Cozy hobbies: I allow myself to indulge in some additional little pleasures that are not necessarily tied to any bigger goal other than pure self-enjoyment, like embroidery, painting, or any other craft I come across that strikes my fancy. This is a time when I allow myself to put big ambitions and long-term goals aside while I fill my cup with the things I enjoy for its sake. Sometimes, those things align with my aspirations, and sometimes, some of the things I try eventually become incorporated into a bigger goal or vision for my future, but this is all allowed to take a backseat while I give myself the care I need.
Physical warmth: Warm drinks, copious amounts of tea, spiced chai, warm baths, quiet time curled up in a blanket with a good book, and winter strolls with appropriately warm outerwear. Anything goes. If it’s warm, I’m in, other than cranking the heat up. While I do long for warmth, I’m trying to keep my experience of life closer to the nature that our ancestors experienced. So, instead of turning up the heat when the house gets chilly, I don a cozy sweater and instruct the rest of my family to do the same. It is good not only for the soul but also for the environment.
Meditation: This is a theme that runs throughout the year, but it becomes especially important in the winter when my tendency is to feel low or depressed. So, I try my best not to skip out on meditation over the coldest days of the year. When my energy or mood is low, it can tend to be when I least feel like meditating, but it’s also when it’s most necessary for me, and I try to remind myself of that. I’ve found that the easiest way to make that happen is to meditate in the morning before the rest of the family is up, and I get caught up in the everyday hustle.
Hygge and the Traditional Work Environment Don’t Mix Well
All that being said, a conflict I run into when it comes to this appreciation of slowing down is that the business world rubs harshly against the grain of this most natural human response to retreat, conserve, and take a slow approach to rejuvenation in preparation for the Spring, which is ancestrally a time of coming out and literal growth. Our animal bodies know that Spring is the time to start anew, not January 1, in the depths of winter. Spring is when we are most naturally infused with a sense of ambition, a preparedness to try new things, build, create, and be better than before. And the corporate world is asking us to do this on January 1st instead—we’ve been so far removed from our nature in this environment.
I hope to work on finding a new approach for myself this coming winter. In January, I want to reconcile the corporate pull to ambition and rebirth with my complete opposite pull to rest and retreat. How I achieve this will be something I must contemplate, but I am determined.
So here are 3 changes I’d like to try this year:
Keeping lighting dim: While it would likely be looked down upon to bring candles into the office, some electric candles would help the setting. This would also be a great time to bring some fairy lights into the space to create cozy vignettes of inviting warmth.
Adding softness: I’ll consider adding some cozy materials and blankets. Perhaps a trip to Habitat ReStore is in order for some low-cost, second-hand options. I think it’s high time that we bring some “resimercial” concepts (the combination of residential and commercial spaces) into our office space - the same things we encourage for our clients.
Physical warmth: Perhaps I’ll set up a cozy drinks station in the corner of our space using simpler options than the uninspiring Keurig already in the staff kitchen. A selection of interesting teas, an aesthetically pleasing electric kettle, a French press or pour-over carafe, and a mug tree adorned with ceramic mugs would essentially recreate my own hot drinks station in my living room.
If I’m honest, I’m getting excited about all these hygge-inspired ideas being brought into my workplace! I will bring it up to the team. And while I can’t directly change people’s attitudes and the nature of business, perhaps some added cozy hominess, especially over the winter months, could return some much-needed figurative warmth and human connection to the space.
Well, there you have it! These are the sorts of thoughts and feelings that run through me when the heat subsides. How do you feel as the end of summer closes in? Which camp are you in? Are you pro-summer, pro-winter, something else? I’d love to hear if any of my experiences resonate with you. Are you inspired to make any changes?
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